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Doctors appointment regarding weight loss went very poorly and feeling dejected


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I made a post on the original CDC forums a long time ago about my weight loss and everyone was so supportive and motivating. Honestly words can't express how much it means. I've dropped 120lbs best shape of my life but now I have skin issues...

 

I'm a male 32 years old and I went to my doctor for a condition known as gynecomastia, which loosely speaking is "man-boobs". I was referred to a plastic surgeon who said they'll cover the surgery but MSP (Canada health plan) will only absorb $400ish dollars. Originally I didn't even want any surgery. I was happy losing it on my own. 

 

But I went to the plastic surgeon and she hit me with the "no amount of working out, weight loss, bulking up, muscle gain, nothing. No matter what you do your chest will never revert back being flat."

 

My heart totally sunk because she said it was cost anywhere around $14,000. 

 

I just don't know what to do now I feel totally defeated. I know and fully realize it's my own fault for letting my weight get out of hand and I don't want any handouts I think just a place to rant really. 

 

Has anybody else gone through the procedure? I really want to but I just don't know. I'm really against any plastic surgery on my body but it's also heartbreaking to hear all my hard work besides getting smaller will never be fixed naturally. 

 

Any advice 😞 ? Has anybody else had something similar done? Any regrets? Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you Vancouver.  

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1 minute ago, Bob Long said:

Never been through this, but I do know you'll never regret 14k but you may regret lost time feeling good about yourself. 

 

 

That really depends on one's financial position.  That's enough to bankrupt a fair chunk of people.

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I'm primarily dropping in to say I am cheering you on all the way. No matter what you decide to do I will always support anyone that goes on a personal journey of improvement.

Well done, my friend!

 

But will add...

I am assuming you are having a tough decision regarding the cost. People make decisions on cost all the time. For some it is the car of choice, for some it is travel, retirement, schooling. You just have to choose your worth to this procedure. You may just find the price tag is irrelevant because it is priceless to you

 

I would also like to give you my respect for sharing your experience with the members here. That is very brave. 💙

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2 minutes ago, Bob Long said:

 

Then be bankrupt. Feeling good about yourself is worth it.

There's also mental health professionals that could possibly help achieve that result.  Since the OP doesn't like the idea of surgery to begin with, I'd recommend starting there anyway.  Personally, I'd have next to an impossible time feeling good about myself being bankrupt.

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how bad is your probelm...? looking at the photo gallery in the below link I personally don't really see a huge aesthetic difference between the before and after shots... certainly not one I would want to spend $14k on, especially if I couldn't afford it.  If the $14k is going to put you in a financial pit for the rest of your life (or at least, the forseeable future) I would say just learn to be confident in your new body.

 

https://dradelynho.com/before-after-gallery/gynecomastia-gallery/

 

You may find this subreddit helpful

 

https://www.reddit.com/r/gynecomastia/

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First and foremost thank you so much everyone. I should have added in the OP that I do have the means to pay for it. It wouldn't bankrupt me but it would certainly put a halt on a lot of things. It's a large amount of money and I have an average job. I'm definitely not rich I can promise you that much, but I don't live paycheck to paycheck. It is financeable so it's not all doom and gloom. 

 

25 minutes ago, Sell.the.team said:

how bad is your probelm...? 

 

https://dradelynho.com/before-after-gallery/gynecomastia-gallery/

 

You may find this subreddit helpful

 

https://www.reddit.com/r/gynecomastia/

 

 

That's very very mild compared to what I have. I don't really feel comfortable sharing actual pictures, but based on those pictures just imagine a full breast. Not enormous like gigantic or I honestly don't know the measurements, but they're definitely big and embarrassing to show in public. If I had to give you more perspective, I would say 3x bigger than what those pictures show in the link you posted + AND because of the loose skin there's overhang on the sides. I wouldn't ever fat or body shame anybody else because I personally don't know their situation but for me, I know that I'm in a healthy place now, and for me when I do take my shirt off at the pool or even at family and friends I know I get 2nd, 3rd or even 4th looks and then I can only imagine the whispers of, "Did you see that guy? wow." 

I know it sounds really shallow for me to say things like that but it's something I do go through and I was so excited that after 2 years of hard work (literally walking for 10k to 20k steps EVERYDAY for 2 years rain,snow,sun, or wind. Probably 10 different pairs of shoes (For those curious I highly recommend Saucony) to hear from a medical professional, "Your chest area will never go back to a regular "mans" chest. It is permanently going to look like that because of your condition. The only fix is surgery." was just a dagger to the heart. The only silver lining is she said my stomach was OK and will revert over time, but there will always be some loose area there or "a dad body" I guess is a more familiar term. Never going to be hard chiseled, cut, ripped, raw iron muscle and to be honest, I don't even WANT to be that. I'd be just fine with even having a small beer gut. 

 

But I think one poster above kind of said what I was thinking that $14,000 is nothing when the reward is feeling great about myself and that it's worth being bankrupt over. I am thankfully not going to be bankrupt, I obviously can't pay $14,000 upfront, but I could certainly finance it just like I would a car so as much as it pains me to have to go through the procedure I think I got the answer I needed. Thank you so much Vancouver words can't express how much I love this city and fan base. You've all be so motivating and supportive. 

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48 minutes ago, King Heffy said:

There's also mental health professionals that could possibly help achieve that result.  Since the OP doesn't like the idea of surgery to begin with, I'd recommend starting there anyway.  Personally, I'd have next to an impossible time feeling good about myself being bankrupt.

 

its two different decisions tho. Surgery is nothing to take lightly, thats for sure, but once they've made that choice and the only thing is money? its why we have bankruptcy laws, it all goes away after a few years anyway. 

 

I just hope @yawn makes the best personal choice for themselves. I've known many more people who regret not doing things over money, but I don't know one that chose happiness that regrets it. 

 

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1 hour ago, yawn said:

I made a post on the original CDC forums a long time ago about my weight loss and everyone was so supportive and motivating. Honestly words can't express how much it means. I've dropped 120lbs best shape of my life but now I have skin issues...

 

I'm a male 32 years old and I went to my doctor for a condition known as gynecomastia, which loosely speaking is "man-boobs". I was referred to a plastic surgeon who said they'll cover the surgery but MSP (Canada health plan) will only absorb $400ish dollars. Originally I didn't even want any surgery. I was happy losing it on my own. 

 

But I went to the plastic surgeon and she hit me with the "no amount of working out, weight loss, bulking up, muscle gain, nothing. No matter what you do your chest will never revert back being flat."

 

My heart totally sunk because she said it was cost anywhere around $14,000. 

 

I just don't know what to do now I feel totally defeated. I know and fully realize it's my own fault for letting my weight get out of hand and I don't want any handouts I think just a place to rant really. 

 

Has anybody else gone through the procedure? I really want to but I just don't know. I'm really against any plastic surgery on my body but it's also heartbreaking to hear all my hard work besides getting smaller will never be fixed naturally. 

 

Any advice 😞 ? Has anybody else had something similar done? Any regrets? Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you Vancouver.  

 

Try the US?  Surprisingly it looks like it's cheaper here.  I just Googled what the average cost in the US is for your skin reduction.  Average cost is 5k here.  Pick up an extra 10 hours of work per week wherever you can, if you can physically work, and you'll have your procedure money within the year.  When you get halfway through with the saving up, start making virtual visits with doctors in Washington State so you can get the ball rolling and appointments set up.

 

https://www.plasticsurgery.org/cosmetic-procedures/gynecomastia-surgery/cost

 

 

Screenshot2024-05-23220004.thumb.png.4c07f7c636b33ced8bb62370c8793a23.png

 

 

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10 minutes ago, Sabrefan1 said:

 

Try the US?  Surprisingly it looks like it's cheaper here.  I just Googled what the average cost in the US is for your skin reduction.  Average cost is 5k here.  Pick up an extra 10 hours of work per week wherever you can, if you can physically work, and you'll have your procedure money within the year.  When you get halfway through with the saving up, start making virtual visits with doctors in Washington State so you can get the ball rolling and appointments set up.

 

https://www.plasticsurgery.org/cosmetic-procedures/gynecomastia-surgery/cost

 

 

Screenshot2024-05-23220004.thumb.png.4c07f7c636b33ced8bb62370c8793a23.png

 

 

Could even go cheaper as many countries with favourable exchange rates have experience with medical tourism:

 

https://us-uk.bookimed.com/article/cheap-gynecomastia-surgery/

 

Czech Republic is pretty awesome to visit for the record.

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I have no experience with your specific scenario, but I'm in a somewhat similar boat in that my teeth are an eyesore (think of a typical hockey player smile).

 

I'm aware that any time I open my mouth, people likely judge, and make comments.

 

I can afford to fix them, but choose not to. If someone thinks less of me for it, meh I don't need to talk to someone who is superficial.

 

Do what you think is best, I just wanted to offer the perspective that you can still have confidence in yourself even when choosing not to make changes.

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12 minutes ago, Master Mind said:

I have no experience with your specific scenario, but I'm in a somewhat similar boat in that my teeth are an eyesore (think of a typical hockey player smile).

 

I'm aware that any time I open my mouth, people likely judge, and make comments.

 

I can afford to fix them, but choose not to. If someone thinks less of me for it, meh I don't need to talk to someone who is superficial.

 

Do what you think is best, I just wanted to offer the perspective that you can still have confidence in yourself even when choosing not to make changes.

I think this is the first time I've ever agreed with you in the off-topic forum.

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I am going to philosophical here

 

I am 66 years old, soon to 67, and it took me the better part of 60 years to be honestly, really happy!

 

IMO, you do what will make you happy. You carry that 24/7 and I can tell you that whether you are rich or poor

 

you will have a much better life being happy!

 

I have a remedy for finding the answer, and it sound so corny, but it has been a fantastic answer for me

 

Now I am being serious, here

 

Go find a place where, no one is around, where you can not hear cars, nor meet people......just you

 

Go there with the understanding that you will be there for 4 hours (you might stay longer or come back)

 

Just sit there and think about what would make you happy, stay as still as you can for as long as you can

 

You might cry, you might laugh, you might laugh and then cry......but stay

 

Tell yourself, that you are good, you are loved (you are!), ask yourself again, what will make you happy

 

Breath the air, smell the air.........be patient, and honor yourself. 

 

You will find your answer!.....TRUST ME! But it does not come fast, it comes gradual, but you will feel great

 

and you will arrive at your answer......you will

 

I honestly go up a mountain to the top.................if you want to throw a rock, throw it, if you want to yell, yell

 

But then go back to quiet.......there is no shame!

 

4 hours! Minimum!

 

Near rapids works too, but stay dry!

 

4 hours of contemplation, 4 hours of you! You will find the answer!

 

What will make you happy?

 

 

 

 

 

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somewhat off-topic here, but I'd make sure you're able to maintain your current and healthy weight before undergoing any surgeries. what happens with a lot of people when they lose weight--especially a large amount--is that they go back to their old habits once they've reached their goal, and they end up being back at their starting weight or worse before they know it. make sure that you've made actual lifestyle changes you can and will stick to. it would really suck to go through a surgical procedure costing so much and then failing to stick to your good habits.

 

with that said, you should be majorly proud of yourself for all you've accomplished here. (also, i don't think people are as judgmental as you think they are; and if they are, they're not the type of people you should be considering when you self-evaluate. i doubt many people are making jokes at your expense when you're, for example, at the pool.)

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3 hours ago, 112 said:

somewhat off-topic here, but I'd make sure you're able to maintain your current and healthy weight before undergoing any surgeries. what happens with a lot of people when they lose weight--especially a large amount--is that they go back to their old habits once they've reached their goal, and they end up being back at their starting weight or worse before they know it. make sure that you've made actual lifestyle changes you can and will stick to. it would really suck to go through a surgical procedure costing so much and then failing to stick to your good habits.

 

with that said, you should be majorly proud of yourself for all you've accomplished here. (also, i don't think people are as judgmental as you think they are; and if they are, they're not the type of people you should be considering when you self-evaluate. i doubt many people are making jokes at your expense when you're, for example, at the pool.)

Thank you!! Yes I have made massive lifestyle changes. Intermittent fasting has just become second nature now with my eating window from 12pm to 7pm. At least 10k steps a day (easier then you think!), and my biggest is watching portion size (eating off a smaller plate helps a lot). Also watching the foods I eat. No more chips, french fries and try to avoid deep-fried foods if possible. 

 

It's definitely not something I'd ever let myself go back to being again. 

 

Yeah I feel comfortable at the gym cause I know majority of people there (obviously there's bad apples everywhere) are really supportive and proud.  Even had people come up to me and say great job and they've noticed a massive change. That's extremely rewarding. 

 

Sorry tldr yes! I'll maintain my healthy changes and I don't think people are making jokes or insulting me behind my back. It's less like, 

"Did u see that guy? Wow he's huge that's disgusting. What a waste of space" or something like that and more like...

"Did you see that guy? Wow. He's big." 

 

I don't think majority of people are cracking jokes at my expense just the 2nd and 3rd takes are very noticeable and it's just a social anxiety thing. I don't want people to do that. I just want to walk past people and either have them ignore me or just acknowledge my presence and move on. 

 

Also as a side note I'm not depressed or unhappy or anything like that. I'm actually happy and have great friends / family. It's more I just feel defeated in the sense there's an obstacle that there's nothing that I can do with my knowledge and skillset to overcome said obstacle. The only means to achieve my ultimate goal is by medical procedure that'll cost a fortune. I hope that makes sense. 

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19 hours ago, yawn said:

I made a post on the original CDC forums a long time ago about my weight loss and everyone was so supportive and motivating. Honestly words can't express how much it means. I've dropped 120lbs best shape of my life but now I have skin issues...

 

I'm a male 32 years old and I went to my doctor for a condition known as gynecomastia, which loosely speaking is "man-boobs". I was referred to a plastic surgeon who said they'll cover the surgery but MSP (Canada health plan) will only absorb $400ish dollars. Originally I didn't even want any surgery. I was happy losing it on my own. 

 

But I went to the plastic surgeon and she hit me with the "no amount of working out, weight loss, bulking up, muscle gain, nothing. No matter what you do your chest will never revert back being flat."

 

My heart totally sunk because she said it was cost anywhere around $14,000. 

 

I just don't know what to do now I feel totally defeated. I know and fully realize it's my own fault for letting my weight get out of hand and I don't want any handouts I think just a place to rant really. 

 

Has anybody else gone through the procedure? I really want to but I just don't know. I'm really against any plastic surgery on my body but it's also heartbreaking to hear all my hard work besides getting smaller will never be fixed naturally. 

 

Any advice 😞 ? Has anybody else had something similar done? Any regrets? Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you Vancouver.  

Hi Yawn, I'm really sorry to hear about your experience.

 

It's important to know that gynocemastia isn't necessarily caused by weight gain or loss. That can be a factor for sure, but it's also due to liver or kidney issues, hormone imbalances, and thyroid conditions. I was about 160lbs and ~10% body fat when I had a lump on my chest that I went to get checked out. I was worried about breast cancer (very rare, but possible in men) or lymphoma. I had never even heard of gynocemastia, but that's what they said it was after a mammogram.

 

I had the same conversation with my doctor, Re: non-surgical methods of reducing or eliminating it. And I got the same answer.

 

The surgery is fairly straight forward, the surgeon will make the incision anlong the border of your areola and your skin so the scar is nearly invisible and remove the mass. For me, I was on the couch for about a week afterwards, as I couldn't really lift my arms above my head, but I was fine after a week. I have absolutely no regrets about it and am very glad I got it done. I mean absolutely no judgement towards people who get nose jobs or whatever, but cosmetic surgery wasn't something I was interested in either. This felt different to me though. A mass of tissue grew somewhere is shouldn't have and it was affecting my well-being (confidence, self worth). There was a medical procedure available to correct it, so I pursued that option.

 

Be kind to yourself man, you've accomplished something incredible taking control on your health and your life. You should be proud. Try not to beat yourself up too much about what may have caused the gynocemastia.

Edited by MattJVD
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41 minutes ago, MattJVD said:

Hi Yawn, I'm really sorry to hear about your experience.

 

It's important to know that gynocemastia isn't necessarily caused by weight gain or loss. That can be a factor for sure, but it's also due to liver or kidney issues, hormone imbalances, and thyroid conditions. I was about 160lbs and ~10% body fat when I had a lump on my chest that I went to get checked out. I was worried about breast cancer (very rare, but possible in men) or lymphoma. I had never even heard of gynocemastia, but that's what they said it was after a mammogram.

 

I had the same conversation with my doctor, Re: non-surgical methods of reducing or eliminating it. And I got the same answer.

 

The surgery is fairly straight forward, the surgeon will make the incision anlong the border of your areola and your skin so the scar is nearly invisible and remove the mass. For me, I was on the couch for about a week afterwards, as I couldn't really lift my arms above my head, but I was fine after a week. I have absolutely no regrets about it and am very glad I got it done. I mean absolutely no judgement towards people who get nose jobs or whatever, but cosmetic surgery wasn't something I was interested in either. This felt different to me though. A mass of tissue grew somewhere is shouldn't have and it was affecting my well-being (confidence, self worth). There was a medical procedure available to correct it, so I pursued that option.

 

Be kind to yourself man, you've accomplished something incredible taking control on your health and your life. You should be proud. Try not to beat yourself up too much about what may have caused the gynocemastia.

People like you are the reason why Vancouver is so amazing. Thank you very much. Yeah I'm definitely going to go for the procedure for exactly what you described. Self worth and feeling good about myself (confidence). If I could buy you a beer I would. 

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8 minutes ago, yawn said:

People like you are the reason why Vancouver is so amazing. Thank you very much. Yeah I'm definitely going to go for the procedure for exactly what you described. Self worth and feeling good about myself (confidence). If I could buy you a beer I would. 

I appreciate the kind words! I was very thankful to my doctor who explained it to me like this: she said "look, if this mass was on your hip or your shoulder or something and causing you pain or reduced range or motion you wouldn't hesitate to get it taken out. Your mental well being is just as important as your physical well being to your overall health. Take care of yourself" (okay, maybe not an exact quote, it was 2014, but that was the jist of it hahaha).

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